The essential ingredient for joyful music making

Think of all the things you have helped your child with so far. You brought them into the world and at the start took care of their every physical and emotional need. While you may be stepping back now they still need your support, help and advice. When you were potty training them you didn’t just say ‘the toilet’s down the hall, off you go’ you had to spend weeks helping them, working out how to make it ‘fun’ and leaving the house prepared for every eventuality. When they got it your job was done, but there will always be more jobs.

Having survived early childhood you may now be thinking about signing your child up for instrumental lessons because you want them to experience the joy of music and hopefully develop a lifelong love of it. Hopefully you’re not signing them up just so they can take exams (psst they won’t develop a love of music just through taking exams – read more about this here).  

They will develop a love of it through making and experiencing music, having fun in lessons and when practising at home and playing great sounding, engaging music. We love and are motivated by things we do well. To do well we have to practice. The better a student plays the more they will want to play and for young learners parents are the key to making this happen. 

Children can’t see the big picture but adults can. It’s up to parents to get the ball rolling so that the child can build skills and successes and realise that hard work leads to successful and enjoyable music making

How do they get to a stage where they can play easily and effortlessly? By practising of course. But you can’t just tell a young child (under 12 but maybe older depending on the child) to go and practice the piano when they get home from their lesson, just like you couldn’t tell them ‘the toilet’s down the hall, off you go’ when you were potty training them. If you want your child to develop a love of music they need your support on a daily basis. If your child sees you not prioritising piano or music, they won’t either and you won’t get the lifelong love of music you’re looking for for your child. Remember progress won’t happen without practice and practice won’t happen unless you make it happen.  

Remember how hard you worked to help him ride his bike? Now it's time for the piano 'training wheels'!

You CAN support your child! Even if you don't know the first thing about music.

And if you’re not musical yourself it doesn’t matter. You are there to support your child, you can learn alongside him or her if you want, or you can be their number 1 supporter. You need to schedule a time, ideally at the same time every day, when piano practice is going to take place and then you need to accompany them to the piano, read the teacher’s homework notes and help them practice.   

If you do know about music or had piano lessons as a child remember things have changed in the last 20 years and the lessons your child has will most likely look nothing like those you experienced.  Ask the teacher questions about why if you like, but you will see for yourself how much better things are these days (with well qualified teachers who keep their skills up to date). Or read about what good quality music lessons look like here.  

If you want your child to succeed, then daily practice is essential. Think about learning to read and how much practice that takes – learning music is even harder because not only do children need to learn to read (eventually), they need to develop technical skills and musical understanding too. There is no short cut. Your child is eager to learn and keen to succeed and the best way to ensure this and keep the child motivated is to get to that piano every day.   

Many families today are very busy with both parents working and children taking part in many extra curricular activities. But if you want to see progress and joyful music making to ensure they love what they are doing and don’t want to quit then making good quality practice a priority is essential. For young beginners this may look like 5 minutes a couple of times a day. If you’re not going to have time to do this at least 4 times a week then your child is not going to make good progress and is at risk of becoming demotivated because of that.

At Surrey Music School we prefer to work with families who are able to commit to this level of practice because it leads to the best possible outcome for the child – a love of music and joyful music making. We can almost guarantee your child will love their music lessons because we only use the most up to date methods, keep our skills well honed through ongoing professional development and are sensitive to each child’s needs. We also help parents support their child at home both through ongoing education via blog posts and responses to individual questions and problems. 

Next time we will look at how parental views, habits and expectations affect their children’s music making and the following we will look at how Surrey Music School supports parents with practice at home. Don’t worry, you’re not alone – we do everything in our power to help you do the best job you can do.